Year 1, Day 35

Tired. Check out my tumblr for some updates. I'll try harder tomorrow.

Year 1, Day 34

Here we are with another late night post.  Not much to say, but there was a nice write up about the library in today's The Times (Gainesville, GA). Of course, I made the mistake of reading the comments--never read the comments because the comments are infested with trolls.

I almost applied for a new credit card (as if I need another means of accruing debt). I also learned that my student loan website has locked my out, which means I now have to call them in order to regain access to my online account.

The tickets to Guardians of the Galaxy have been purchased and the anticipation builds. I need to read through the Guardians graphic novel that I currently have in my position despite the fact that it is the original Guardians as opposed to the Guardians of the silver screen.

I really need to find a means of overcoming the malaise that I currently find myself in.  I struggled with my relinquished burden again, but my admiration is slowly turning into disdain and I think that this is an appropriate response because I need something to fill that void that currently consumes me.

Year 1, Day 33

Supposedly, tonight's temperature is supposed to fall into the high 50s, but in my room and in front of my keyboard, I am basting.  I know that this will most likely be another uncomfortable evening in which little sleep is found, but I should take a moment and talk about a few things that will take my mind off this heat. For example, the new Manchester United kits for the upcoming campaign.

From L to R:  Primary | Secondary | Alternate

First (and I know that this point has been beaten to death), what is the deal with the oversized Chevrolet logos?  It is difficult enough to be sponsored by a poor car manufacturer, but now, they have emblazoned the chests of my beloved Red Devils with not only that ridiculous symbol, but the name of their company too. Anyway, in comparison to last season's primary shirt, this year's primary shirt falls short because of its lack of collar. In truth, it remains of the shirt from two campaigns ago, but now you have to button up the shirt.

Next is the secondary shirt, which I believe is the best of the three new shirts and if it were not for that ridiculous sponsor logo; I would not only purchase, but I could wear it to work.

The alternate shirt is interesting and I'm not sure if that is good or bad.  The thing I find funny about this kit is that many of the Twitter accounts I follow that are primarily MLS accounts derided the shirt as one of the worst they have ever and yet, this is the same group of people that praised the Colorado Rapids secondary (or alternate--the blue Colorado flag shirt) is one of the best they have seen in the league. Oh well.

Year 1, Day 32

I am a jack-of-some-trades and certainly, a master of none.  Through my thirty-plus years, I have worked at a burger joint, a pizza joint, a medical manufacturing plant (in a clerical capacity), two political campaigns, a trucking company (as a relief dispatcher), a fastener manufacturing plant (in quality control) and now, a library.  To be honest, the times I had the most fun on the job was with the political campaigns, but those positions also proved to be rather challenging too. I enjoy my work in the library, but this is a major deviation from my original career goal of becoming an attorney. Also, there are moments in dealing with either my coworkers or with patrons that I become jaded.  To be frank, I already live a rather pessimistic life and I do not need to be egged on by my peers.

Anyway, there is really no point behind today's entry.  It is just me wasting time and filling space and in truth, I probably could have written on a more specific topic, but I'm not quite feeling up for it.

Year 1, Day 31

I honestly thought about continuing my rant from last night, but I decided that it was best to leave the dead horse alone.  Instead, I thought that I would use my brief time this evening to discuss some of the things that I am looking forward to in world of personal fandoms.

First is Guardians of the Galaxy.  The Marvel (Cinematic) Universal finally enters space and it looks amazing.  I cannot wait to see what James Gunn brings to the big screen.

Second is Batgirl #35.  Yes, this is not due out until the fall, but the new redesign of Batgirl's costumed coupled with a new team at the helm is sure to make this a memorable issue and I am not even a single-issue reader.

SOURCE:  Cameron Stewart on Tumblr

Third and I am in a bit of a rush now is Dragon Con. Coming off the heels of having to endure a weekend of San Diego Comic Con coverage, I am ready to have my own convention adventure and what better convention to have an adventure at than "North America's Largest Science-Fiction and Fantasy Convention", Dragon Con?  My coworker traveling companions and I cannot wait to cut lose and let our geek fly amongst a sea of our peers--maybe I will run into you there? (REMEMBER:  I'm bespectacled guy with a debonair mustache) 

Year 1, Day 30

Well, Batman Day (at the library) has come and gone and while it appears as though there were some swag bags left (at least at a little past noon), I was glad to see that the presentation worked and happy to hear that it was well received.  Of course, no moment of joy at the library can last too long as a particular patron made it a point to rain our parade by being a royal bitch to my two coworkers.  Odd enough, this same patron just submitted an application to volunteer at our branch and needless to say, I want nothing to do with her.  Now, all I have to do is come up with some lame excuse for not bringing her on as a volunteer despite our need.  To be honest, I want to be frank and straightforward with the patron and tell her that I simply do not want to bring on an individual, paid or volunteer, that believes that they are better than us and will create unnecessary distractions due to the fact that we have had multiple issues with her in the past.

Anyway, enough with the negative vibes. After I stopped by the library to check on the status of Batman Day, I stopped by Uncle Maddio's Pizza Joint and ascertained another free individual pizza (two free pizzas in three days equals HELL YEA!).  Personally, the concept isn't revolutionary, but the setup does set it apart from your run-of-the-mill pizza joints.  Think of Maddio's as Subway, but for pizza.  As for the actual pizzas, they were good and since it only takes six-and-a-half minutes to cook each pie; it is a feasible lunch option.  In comparison to other pizza places in the area, it is definitely a second-tier pizza joint:  not nearly as good as say Mellow Mushroom or Little Italy's, but far better than Little Caesar's Pizza and Stevie B's.  In other words, I would say it is in the same area as other major pizza chains like Pizza Hut and Papa John's, but I think I may prefer Maddio's over the two because of the concept of building your own pie and seeing it actually be made.

After lunch, I headed down to Buford for the second time this week.  I was headed down primarily for the Anime Weekend Atlanta event at Barnes & Noble, but since I arrived in town early; I stopped by Galactic Quest and picked up the latest trade Superior Spider-man volume (I know that I shouldn't have, but sometimes you have to treat yourself).  When I arrived at B&N, there wasn't really a crowd for the event, which consisted of a costume contest and an art and trivia contest.  Of course, as the contest drew closer, a small number of cosplayers did appear and a small crowd did gather to watch the contest.  There were a few standout costumes, but I felt out of place because (1) I was much older than the vast majority of the people in attendance and (2) I did not recognize a number of the entries.

But, as I stood there, I was privy to a number of comments from curious onlookers unaware of the growing anime community and it drew my err.  In truth, this aggravation has been festering me for some time and it actually covers a wide range of fandoms, but it is still baffling to me how individuals are so taken back by the notion that an individual could actually have a wide range of interests.  For example: today, some of the onlookers my snide and ignorant comments about the characters and the event by saying that the event was some poor man's San Diego Comic Con.  Okay, but no, it is not (and in truth, they said as much, but they did not mean it in the same way that I mean it).  For some, the chance to participate in such events is more than satisfactory and to brush it off as if it was pointless venture reeks of ignorance.

Anyway, I actually have much more to say on this matter, but I need to get this posted before the day ends. And one more thing, my Tumblr is up and running and can be found at:  johnpast30.tumblr.com

Year 1, Day 29

After nearly a week of work, I have finally finished my slideshow presentation for Batman Day at the library. Of course, there are a number of ideas that did not make it into the slide, but there is nothing more that can be done. All I can hope for now is that it runs smoothly come tomorrow.

On a another note, I am considering a tumblr site to go alongside this site.  Of course, this site will continue to serve as my primary journal, but the tumblr blog could be used to further expand my plans for avoiding oblivion. Also, there is a number of incredible things that can be identified and then shared easily on tumblr.

If I create a tumblr site, I will link it here on this site. There is a good chance that I will use the same name and address, if possible. It is also my hope that I will be much more active with this tumblr site than I was with my previous tumblr site, which was hampered by my limiting moniker.

Also, I'm hoping, once I start watching movies again, to introduce a recurring "column" to John Past 30 that will simply be shite movie reviews. Anyway, pardon me as I go forth and expand my sphere of influence.

Year 1, Day 28

I'm tired, sore and I just want to be left alone. Sorry.

Year 1, Day 27

So, here's the plan for the next two months (please refrain from using this entry as a means of stalking or murdering me):

• AWA Staff Meeting
• Guardians of the Galaxy
• Braves versus Dodgers plus Weezer concert
• Dragon Con (single day--Saturday or Sunday)
• Anime Weekend Atlanta

It seems pretty easy and straight forward, but the cost is what will eventually kill me financially. I am excited about it despite the eventual financial problems it will cause for me.

I will admit that I am really looking forward to what lies ahead over the next couple of months.

Year 1, Day 26

Today was another long day.  It was not as long or as busy as yesterday, but today had its moments. One moment involved a patron that could not understand our policy about not tying bicycles on the trees immediately in front of the library. It was not so much has ignorance of our policy, but his attitude and use of profanities in the presence of young children. My second moment was much more lighthearted and humorous and involved to bearded and elderly men.  In the opinion of my co-worker, both of these individuals could have easily been confused for extras on Duck Dynasty except they were at the library and there was no crew present. It turned out that one of these individuals had run for mayor of Atlanta despite being homeless and situated in a town nearly sixty miles away.  I would continue, but I do not want to capture the attention of these two individuals.

As of now, I sit in my bedroom awaiting the results of today's runoff election. Personally, I do not bother myself with politics as much as I once did, but I still enjoy Election Night. In truth, the results of the most significant races of the night hold little interest to me because I am a single-party voter.  Regardless, it is still excellent to observe.

Year 1, Day 25

Today was one of the busiest days at the library in some time. From the moment we opened until the moment I left at approximately 6:30 PM, there was barely a moment to catch our breaths. In truth, the only opportunity we had of seeing the second floor was prior to opening.

I will admit that the muscles in my right leg are sore and that even as I draft this entry, I find myself fending off exhaustion. But, this is not to say I did not enjoy the day. In fact, it is on days such as this that I find myself energized and invigorated.

Anyway, it should get to bed because I know not how much longer this shall pass. 

Year 1, Day 24

Today was the epitome of a "Lazy Sunday" because I did nothing productive.  The only things I did today were watch anime, watch old episodes of Epic Rap Battles of History, read graphic novels, and eat.  Well, I did a handful of other things, but they were nothing I would openly share in public.  Since my Sunday was lacking in any sort of interesting activities and I am not in the mood to opine on anything in particular, allow me to share some my favorite ERB episodes:

This is just a small sample of the epicness that is ERB.  I have a number of other favorites (e.g., the Hitler vs. Vader trilogy), but to name them all would make this entry particularly longer than necessary.

Year 1, Day 23

Today, I was tired and miserable and I did not want to deal with anyone (patrons or coworkers), but I gritted my teeth and went about my business.  I suppose despite my grumpy morning exterior, I still desire to be recognized and greeted and yet, this did not happen and I knew that it would not happen.  Regardless, I still expected it and I was met with disappointment with a tinge of jealously at the fact that everyone else seemed to enjoy one another's company.

As I reflect back on some of my latest entries, I have reached the conclusion that I sound incredibly needy and desperate and while I am needy (e.g. - I need a better paying job, I need to clear my debts, etc.), I have little need nor desire to be desperate.  And it is with this in mind that I shed the burden of my unrequited love for a coworker that clearly has no interest in me.  It is clear that after nearly a year-and-a-half of this nonsense that nothing is ever going to change and I am only doing a disservice to myself and my departmental coworkers by continually allowing myself to be distracted by this foolishness.  So, with that being said, I bid adieu to unnecessary and unwanted feelings of unrequited love.  Good bye and good riddance.

Now, to the business at hand:  I stand at a crossroad in my life in which I must make the decision to either advance my current career path or alter my path once more.  At the moment, I am leaning toward the former, but there remains an inkling of wishing to return to my passion of politics.  I understand at the moment that my skills are dated and connections drastically hampered by poor personal decisions, but if I have learned anything from the various scandals that politicians place themselves in; it is that redemption is always possible through a proper public relations strategy.

I suppose my political itch is being driven by a gubernatorial election year in which a Democrat has a strong opportunity to oust a scandal-embroiled Republican incumbent.  Of course, this itch always hits me during this time and while I may have a lingering bitter taste in my mouth from past political business; I find the political theater to be enthralling and truly captivating. Anyway, I am only speaking out of my own ass and I have plenty of other business to tend to before I make any drastic decisions.

After this entry, I feel a lot better and I think things are going to get better--if not immediately, then at least, somewhere down the line.  From here on out, I am only about myself and my family (well, the family that I like) because at the end of the day:  only I am going to watch for me and only I will have my own back. Now, I'm not saying that my outlook on life has been radically altered--I'm just saying that I have one less burden on my back and it's all about me.  This my sound conceited because it is, but I like it because it is simple and to the point.

Year 1, Day 22

I know that I have been hitting all the sour and bitter notes this week with my posts, but I thought I would switch things up today by sharing with you one of my "guilty pleasures":  "Weird Al" Yankovic.  If you did not know, Weird Al has a new album out and during the past week the weird one has been flooding the inter-tubes with videos and tracks from his album: Mandatory Fun.  Anyway, here are some of the videos that I have been able to find on YouTube--sit back and enjoy:

The comedic cameos and outfits in this parody of Pharrell Williams' "Happy" are glorious and of course, it is just as infection an ear worm as the original.

I will be the first to admit that I guilty of using terrible grammar and misspelling words, especially, when spell check is not available, but I think we should all take a moment to ponder some of the tips and hints that Weird Al provides in this parody of Robin Thicke's "Blurred Lines".

At last, Weird Al confirms what we have all known about aluminum foil--that it is a great way to store sandwiches and other foods and that it will protect our brains from the mind-altering rays that the Illuminati are sending out to the masses.  Who knew that a parody set to Lorde's "Royals" could be so informative? The answer: Weird Al did.

There was actually one more video that was released, but it was released in partnership with Yahoo! Screen and well, to be frank, I did not want to be bothered with embed codes and the sort. So, you can go look it up for yourself--it is called "Handy" and it is a parody of Iggy Azalea's "Fancy".

Anyway, enjoy the tracks and have a pleasant evening and hopefully, I will "see" you tomorrow.

Year 1, Day 21

I am back on my iPhone grind as I am simply too lazy to set up the PC. Anyway, today marked the end of the regular work week since the system has a furlough day scheduled for tomorrow. I could plenty about furlough days, but that would require use of a keyboard. This work week has been incredibly manageable; tamed almost. I suppose with the summer winding down, there is just so many other things to concern themselves with. This won't run too long since it is getting late and I am getting tired. I just wanted to say that I am coming up with what I think are brilliant ideas for a number of personal projects.

Year 1, Day 20

I am still in the midst of my "Batman Day" brainstorming, but I thought that I would share some thoughts with you about some of the things I have been doing over the past couple of days (aside from moping about the end of the World Cup):

First, I just want to say that I love the song "Stay With Me" by Sam Smith.  I first heard about this song and about Sam Smith on NPR and after the events of the past couple of weeks, the song really struck a chord with me.

I know that it is foolish of me to continue longing for someone that is obviously disinterested in me, but I simply could not get over the possibility of losing her--even if she was just transferring to another branch within the system.  I honestly have not felt this way about someone in such a long time--I really cannot explain my feelings, but I know that it would have hurt tremendously even if she did not realize it herself.

Second, another song that I have been really digging is Bleachers' "I Wanna Get Better".  I understand that this track does have some particularly morbid themes to it, but the hook draws me in.  Again, this all goes back my unrequited longing and how I want to change and become more like the sort of man she wants and deserves.  I know that this is sounding rather pathetic, but I am simply a man that longs to be loved.

Of course, I couldn't leave this update on such a depressing note. So, here is a unique take on Ferris Bueller's Day Off starring stars from Major League Soccer and United States women's national team:

Year 1, Day 19

Something exciting has landed at my feet and while I have not been formally invited to assist in the preparation, I know that I would be glad to lend a hand if needed. For those that were unaware, 2014 marks the 75th Anniversary of Batman and it happens that as of this afternoon, our library will be one of thousands of libraries celebrating "Batman Day" at the Library on July 26. In truth, I have been searching for a project to undertake that would pique my interest and this could be it. As of now, I am working through a couple of ideas to work on in regards to my part in this awesome event. Actually, I should be getting back to that now.

Year 1, Day 18

Okay, here are my thoughts on the World Cup finale:

1. The match was far more entertaining than its 2010 equivalent.
2. Personally, it was a disappointing result because I was supporting Argentina.
3. For some unknown reasons, I have come to dislike the German squad.
4. But, I will admit that Mario Götze's winner was superb.
5. And Gonzalo Higuain and Messi, blew their opportunities to score.

I have nothing else to say in regards to that matter. It was a satisfactory ending to a fantastic tournament.

Year 1, Day 17

The World Cup is over and I am tired. I would speak more about the final and the feelings of disappoint it invoked within me, but that will have to wait for another day. I know that this isn't much of an update, but one learns that there be moments like this from time to time.

Year 1, Day 16

Tonight's update is coming to you from my grandfather's house (actually, it is my aunt and uncle's house, but that is besides the point since it was basically my grandpa that forced them to move from Virginia to Georgia). Anyway, I'm playing caretaker for the evening while my aunt, uncle and mother spend some time and money in Cherokee. Of course, I have no intentions of boring you with the details (of which there are few) of my time watching over my grandpa instead I plan on boring you with my prediction for tomorrow's World Cup final match between Argentina and Germany.

I suppose you could dub this match "the best player in the world" (since the current best player of the world crapped out of the tournament in the group stage) versus "the current best national team in the world" (given their dominate victory against Brazil in the semifinal round). If one were to go by each side's performance thus far in the tournament, then Germany would have to be considered the heavy favorites to win. But, I could care less about recent past performances instead I chose to believe that Germany have played their best match of the tournament already and Lionel Messi has yet to fully play to his potential.  And this is why I believe that Argentina behind a legacy-solidifying performance from Messi will win the World Cup final in the home of their greatest national rivals, Brazil, while at the same time ensuring that Europeans remain trophy-less in World Cups played in South America (or the Americas in General).  

Year 1, Day 15

I am drafting part of this update as await my food at the recently reopened Hardee's in Oakwood. I find myself listening to a conversation between two clearly odd Southern individuals (my PC way of saying bat-shit crazy rednecks). In truth, it is not as off-putting as one would believe, but then again, I am eating at a Hardee's. Anyway, I find myself in area (again) because I am reluctant to go home lest I find more bad news (i.e., my half-brother and possibly the parasite the leaches onto his being and causes him greater stupidity). I know that I sound mean, but my sentiments are based solely on fact. Yet, while I may disapprove of the relationship--I am a bit envious. I mean, here we have two complete and utter drains on society and they were able to find one another and despite their ofttimes contentious relationship; they are usually able to work things out much to the chagrin of each person's parent(s). I suppose my envy comes from own desire to be in a functional and cooperative relationship and the fact that I am unable to do anything to change my situation because I am so inundated with a certain youth librarian. Hell, I am even envious of the potentially incestuous relationship that may exist between the odd couple from Hardee's. Well, I'm done with my meal and with part of this post--onto the next stop...wherever that might be.

Back home. The weather on the drive home was being incredibly temperamental with torrential storms in certain parts and bright skies in other parts. Anyway, there was no good news at home as I had expected as the bastard continues to carry out his charade.  I feel as though I have written enough tonight, but I thought I'd share one more bit of information before calling a night: I...

Year 1, Day 14

I have a number of things running across my mind at the moment, but the most pressing is the nearly certain impending departure (via promotion) of a particular children's librarian. Of course, it could be all this worrying is for naught, but I find it difficult to believe that she will not get the position because she is such an incredible person with a beautiful soul and heart to match. I joked with my co-worker that if she left, then I would lose the sole bright spot in my day, but I was not joking because it was the truth. Anyway, I guess I will leave it at that lest I become too emotional to create some semblance of sense.

Year 1, Day 13

I am almost afraid to admit it, but today was a good day. I went to work, I went bowling and then I had dinner with a couple of coworkers friends. Sadly, these good days seem few and far in between, but I suppose it is because of that rarity that I am able to appreciate the good days just that much more. It is a far cry from my other existence, an existence filled with drama (much of which is self-inflicted) and anguish. Anyway, rather than conclude this brief update on a sour note, allow me to say that I do not difficult situations (they strengthen you the battles ahead) but it does not hurt to have some easy days too.

Year 1, Day 12

Football (soccer) is amazing. Football can be the cause of pure, unbridled joy. Football can be the cause of unfathomable anguish. Today, as I found myself struggling to make through my final shift at the circulation desk, a football-crazed nation struggled with the historic failure of its beloved national side. At times, football is amazing, but it can also be the worst thing in the world. 

Year 1, Day 11

So, I have been trying to figure out what to write about this evening and as of now; I am drawing a blank. So, to steal an idea from lovely (in her own sort of way) Grace Helbig (spelling?) of the It's Grace YouTube channel, I am going to have a "stream of consciousness" style post (basically, I spout crap directly from my mind through fingers onto the screen). Of course, this would work better as a video rather than a journal entry, but F*CK IT!

I think I may hate my younger half-brother or maybe I am just an extremely selfish and self-centered individual.

I have so many things to read, but I just don't do it.

I am rather certain that I will fall asleep soon after publishing this update.

I am regretting my decision to use this format for drafting an update.

The Chevrolet emblem emblazoned across the chest of the new Manchester United shirt looks incredibly gaudy.

Anyway, I think this should suffice because in truth, this was a terrible idea that I will not be revisiting again anytime soon.

Year 1, Day 10

How was my weekend? To be honest, rather poor, but it could be much worse (it could always be much worse). First, I spent the first part of my extended weekend trying to reconcile the fact that I am in dire financial straits (is that the correct term?). Second, my drama-filled younger half-brother has once again shown up at our doorway, but rather than linger about as before; he has taken to taking my mother's vehicle while she serves as caretaker to her father (my grandfather). Third, I have been bored. Yes, there were soccer matches to be watched, but let's be frank and say that the past few matches I have watched have been rather lackluster in comparison to earlier games at the World Cup.

I know that I said that I would try to decrease the number of negative posts I publish, but old habits, die hard. In truth, I know that my parents will support me if I need help (or at least, my mother will--my father has his own financial hardships to resolve). And I know that most likely this current situation with my brother will blow over and he will be out of my hair sooner rather than later and even if it is a more long-term issue, then I know it is for the better because he needed to exorcise this petulant parasite from his life anyways. In the end, he is family and hopefully, he will learn something from this experience though it is looking like it is off to a shaky start. Finally, I know that financial restraint will pay off in the long term and that short-term boredom will eventually lead to long-term happiness. I have debts to be paid and career decisions to make, but I will evaluate my current situation and hopefully, come to a wise decision.

If there is one thing I know about myself, it is this: despite my generally negative outlook on things (I prefer to think of it as being more realistic); I have a knack for finding the silver lining in even the most dire or situations. I only realized this recently when a friend and I were conversing about job resumes for our less than marketable patrons at the library.

Year 1, Day 9

I know that I have been in a foul mood lately, but I am trying to change; it is not as easy as flipping a switch from bad mood to good mood.

So, I thought that I would take a moment to list some of the things that bring me joy:

World Cup

There is no denying that this year's World Cup is one of the greatest in history. Personally, it is the greatest World Cup that I have had the privilege of witnessing. Then again, I have only witnessed six World Cups (1994, 1998, 2002, 2006, and 2010), which is actually quite a bit more than I had expected--I'm old.  Anyway, from the valiant efforts of the United States men's national team to the amazing Cinderella run of fellow CONCACAF nation Costa Rica, this World Cup has had goals galore, last-minute drama, and outstanding individual efforts--the type of stuff that television executives drool over.

Kiya (My 2013 Kia Rio)

I have driven only a handful of automobiles in my lifetime, but I have come to love my Kiya because she is mine and while she was not my first choice; I have grown to love her handling, stereo system and fuel efficiency. I can do an entire week's worth of work commutes on a single tank of gasoline! And while there is still some adjusting to be done in terms of comfort, I have come to appreciate its snug interior. I just love being behind the wheel and on those very rare occasions that I am not driving; I feel lost, but the passenger seat is remarkably comfortable.

John Green Books and the Vlogbrothers Community

I am a John Green fanboy and despite only recently deciding to take the plunge on reading his books, I love them and I do not care if they are "Young Adult" books; a good book is good regardless of its genre. In truth, I have been follow John and his brother, Hank, (YouTube's vlogbrothers) off and on for a number of years now, but only recently have they become a constant part of my life.  Yes, I am a Nerdfighter and while I wish I could be more participatory in the community; I know that John and Hank still welcome me into this community. Believe me when say this: once I become more financially stable--I will being doing much more to help them in their cause of reducing world suck.  Also, I just love the notion of DFTBA (Don't Forget To Be Awesome).

Anyway, I'm feeling slightly better and with the premiere of the second season of Space Dandy tonight; I know I'm on my way to a much better mood. In truth, I really should make an effort to draft these sort of posts more frequently because always being mopey is no way to live one's life. DFTBA!

Edited on 5 July 2014 at 17:05

Year 1, Day 8

Hello!

I hope that you are having a fun and festive Independence Day and for my non-American companions, I hope that you are having a nice day.

Personally, I have grown out of the "getting into the spirit of the holiday" mode and I take most holidays as just another day on the calendar, which is a bit sad, but at the same time; a side effect of growing older and more bitter.

In truth, I would take this time to discuss my younger half-brother and the continuous drama and mayhem he brings into my life.  In all honesty, I should have been an only child, but some screw ups along the way by both of my parents and I found myself with a half-brother that I rarely want anything to do with.

He and I are polar opposites of one another and yet, we same to share similar fates.  He is five years my junior and for the past couple of years he has been involved with this terrible relationship with this terrible individual.

How is this person terrible?  Well, you always here stories from the conservatives about lazy Americans that live off the dime of productive taxpayers--she is one of those individuals.  Trust me, I am by no means a conservative nor am I a believer in the idea that government assistance is a negative thing, but this individual's poor life choices, unwillingness to obtain and retain employment and persistent abuse of my younger half-brother makes me sick to my stomach.

Despite having spent the better part of the past three or four years living with one another, there have never been discussions of marriage because this would lead to the loss of her qualifications for SNAP since she would be married with two children from two different fathers (she originally had three children from another individual, but lost custody of that child while spending time in incarceration).  Anyway, during their time together, my younger half-brother has virtually had to support this blight on society single-handedly along with her continuously abusive mother.

In fact, the amount of drama generated from their relationship has not only spilled over into the live my mother and father, but into his professional life when he lost his decent wage position because of his inability to manage his problems with this individual.

Over time this had led to a number of instances where he and they (at times) have ended up at my parents and I's home, which in turn, causes me distress.  I like playing the role of the lone child despite my age, but their presence throws everything on its head.

I know I spend a lot of time on this site venting, but this is partially part of the reason why I created this site; to provide a venue to vent my frustrations.  There is so much more that I want to discuss, but I am tired and I just don't have the energy to just let everything out at once.

Happy Independence Day!

Year 1, Day 7

Today, I went on a drive.  As I was driving, I found myself listening to the Atlanta Symphony Orchestra on Georgia Public Broadcasting.  The evening's theme was the works of Johannes Brahms. Now, I will readily admit that I am not an avid listener of classical music nor am I able to distinguish between the minute intricacies that dictate whether or not a performance of a particular piece is good or bad.  All I know is that there are moments when I find myself settling in and listening to classical music; tonight was one of those moments.  Anyway, to get to the point of this post, as I was driving and listening, I recalled the host of the program describing Brahms' Alto Rhapsody and explaining its story--a story that involves an unrequited love and Brahms' reaction to the news of his love's engagement to another man.

Of course, being an individual involved in many similar situations myself, I felt a connection to this classical composer and in particular, to this piece and while I will once again admit that I am clueless as to what is actually being sung throughout the piece; I felt what the host was describing about the piece.  Ultimately, I found myself contemplating about my own ineptitude because when Brahms was slighted by the news of his object of affection's engagement to a man that was not Brahms himself; he composed an orchestra. As for me, what could I do?  Sure, I can write about my affections, but it seems to lack the flair of drafting an actual orchestra piece.

Anyway, here is a performance of the piece:

Year 1, Day 6

There were no World Cup matches today, but that does not mean that I am at a lost for topics to discuss this evening (as to whether or not I choose to discuss them is a whole other matter).  First, I would like to take a more personal tone and discuss my ongoing battle with debt.  I am in debt--severe debt, debt that will take decades (at my current pace) to clear.  From credit cards to student loans, I am in debt up to my eyeballs and sadly, I see no relief in sight.  This month is particularly difficult because of my automobile insurance payment, which alone accounts for nearly 30% of my total monthly income. Yes, I only have to worry about this particular expenditure only twice a year, but I am so financially irresponsible that I am not capable of setting aside the appropriate amount of funds to ensure that this expenditure does not become an additional burden upon my already strained financial status.  Of course, there is no one else to blame for my shortcomings other than myself, but I cannot envision a lifestyle in which I deprive myself of some leisurely exploits.  As much as it chagrins me to say it:  it is a fact that you only live once and why should I deprive myself of joy because of debt.

The second topic I would like to make my opinion known about is the recent Supreme Court ruling the Hobby Lobby case.  It is bullshit.  For starters, equating corporations (tightly-held or not) to people when there are individuals (i.e., women) within society that are not treated as equals within mankind.  Then, there is the scary potential of major corporations or businesses recusing themselves from abiding to legal statues simply because it impedes upon their "religious freedom".  In case you may be wondering:  businesses are not people.

Year 1, Day 5

Well, the Great American Soccer Journey in Brasil has reached its conclusion, but before the casual soccer fans crawl back into their man caves for the next four years; we should reflect back upon the amazing time we have shared over the course of the past three weeks.

It began abruptly three weeks ago yesterday when national team captain Clint Dempsey scored the quickest World Cup goal in American history against Ghana.  In that match, we watched sphincters clinched for over eighty minutes as the boys in the rocket popsicle to tops fended off the advances of the menacing Ghanaian attack before finally relenting and allowing the equalizer. It was at this point that a new hero was born when John Brooks, the son of an American serviceman and a German mother (like so many of our other players), scored the winner in the 87th minute with a thunderous snap down header off a Graham Zusi cross.  Pure joy.

When next we met up with the lads of the men's national soccer team, a new chant had swept the sporting landscape across America; a chant that old fans of the beautiful game had known about for the past couple of MLS seasons:

I

I believe

I believe that

I believe that we

I believe that we will win

I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN!

And along with "I Believe", we were introduced to new hashtags:  #OneNationOneTeam (abbreviated #1N1T), #IBelieve, #IBTWWW and #USMNT.  Anyway, back to the matches:

When next we met up with USMNT, we found ourselves sporting white golf shirt tops while entrenched deep within the Amazon rainforest.  Our foes this time around:  Portugal or more accurately, Cristiano Ronaldo and 10 other Portuguese men.  If you had asked me going into the match if I would be satisfied by a draw with the supposedly fourth-ranked national team side in FIFA, my answer would have been a resounding YES!  But, after going down a goal within five minutes of kickoff and then grabbing the lead with less ten minutes plus stoppage time remaining only to squander that lead after 4:30 of 5 minutes of stoppage time, my answer became an irrational NO!

We could have clinched passage to the next stage at that moment, but instead, we found ourselves battling it out with the other sides remaining in our group not named Germany for qualification into the knockout stage.  Of course, this would not be easy given the fact that our next opponent was Germany.  On a rain drenched day, the Americans battled valiantly until the Germans remembered that they were the Germans and eventually, put us away 1-0.  Fortunately, Cristiano Ronaldo became an unlikely American hero when he propelled Portugal to a victory over Ghana.

It was at this point that soccer or World Cup fever was hitting its fever pitch and our next opponents in the first knockout stage match: Belgium.  Of course, if you have seen the news, then you know what happened. But, I will say this:  The USMNT has NOTHING to hang their heads about after their performance. It was a truly valiant, truly American performance and it was fantastic.  Thank you USMNT for making us proud.

Edited on 1 July 2014 @ 21:25