I am unable to put into words the amount of hatred I feel towards COVER LETTERS! My god! What is the point?! Am I really going to miss out on a job because I am incapable of regurgitating my resume into a block-style letter format?
From the countless asinine tips from professionals to the vast multitudes of bland and generic templates for every industry known to man except for the one position I need, cover letters are redundant, ridiculous, stupid, and useless. What does a cover letter offer that a resume does not or, better yet, a generic application of employment form?
Do hiring manager actually sit down and read any of these letters? Honestly, the idea that an individual would rather read a cover letter over a bulleted list of professional experiences and academic achievements is baffling. And yet, here I am--struggling to put together a series of words into a paragraph of sentences that will astonish yet not overwhelm, demonstrate confidence while exhibiting humility, and be dynamic yet not too over-the-top.
Read that last sentence again (I will wait) and reach the same realization that I reached many moons ago: cover letters are contradictory pieces of garbage that serve the sole purpose of confusing rational individuals for the amusement of human resource managers and hiring managers.
I am honestly at the point of simply saying "FUCK IT!" and just writing whatever comes to mind (very similar to what I am doing at this moment), but I cannot. Why? Because I really need this job and I really want this job and because I have been conditioned to jump through hoops like a circus monkey in order to earn a treat.
If they want a cover letter, then I will give them a cover letter. But, by god, if I am ever in a position in which I able to make hiring decision, then you can damn well believe that cover letter will NOT be necessary because despite being an asshole most of the time; I can be a nice guy too.