November 1: Holy crap! So, today has been wet. The day has been filled with persistent rainfall and it does not look as though it will let up until forever! Today, is the start of NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) for many people--it is not for me. But, I'm still posting on a far more consistent basis (though I still miss days--a lot of days). To be honest, the rain is a drain and I could do without the emotional drain right now because the upcoming week is going to be a critical week. On top of the ongoing domestic stress, my professional stress levels are about to enter into overdrive because of a number of things (aside from my current state of unemployment), but mainly, these two things: 1) I'm like to find out if my unemployment benefits claim is either accepted or denied--I'm lending towards the latter because I'm a pessimist and because my phone interview with the assessor went less than good--and 2) I'm hoping to hear something from my primary employment opportunity because if I do not hear from it, then I can pretty much draw the curtains on my career as a librarian because if can't even get an interview for a position in which I have legitimate connections at; then I'm not getting a shot anywhere else (at least, not in a library position).
Anyways, my stress and tension level are at critical and this dreary weather is not helping me. In yesterday's post, I noted my disdain for Halloween and I spent the day doing near nothing. So, I was restless today and suffering from cabin fever on top of the aforementioned stress. I needed to get out, I needed an escape--so, I did what I normally do when I have little to no disposable income: I drove--thank goodness for below $2 per gallon gasoline prices. I had no destination, but it is never really about the destination--it's always about me being in my car listening to music and driving (or escaping). Of course, pathetic me--I wind up in Athens at the library (I seriously cannot get away from libraries, but then again, I really don't want to). I spent about an hour reading comics and thinking of my next immediate move, but I had gotten my day started much too late and I dislike driving in the dark and I dislike driving in the dark during a rain storm even more. So, I went home, but I got away for a bit and afterwards, I spent it watching Sidemen YouTube gaming videos and now, I've been stuck on a new obsession: Casey Neistat videos.
Honestly, this guy is hustling hard and he's only two years older than me. He is doing so much and it looks as though he is enjoying every minute of it. I want to say that he's inspired me, but I know that would be bullshit statement because inspiration means actually taking some form of action. In truth and more accurately, he's made me envious though I keep on wanting to say otherwise. I mean watching his work makes me want to do better, but let's be frank: it isn't going to get any better than this for me, but it can sure as hell get worse. Anyways, I think I'm going to get back to living vicariously through another.
